Hmmm! One of my all time favorite television-viewing pleasures is the FOOD NETWORK. I took a couple of hours last weekend to watch a few shows, one of which is titled “Behind the Bash.”
How interesting, though, that the name which indicates its content of showcasing the tremendous amount of work that goes on behind the scenes as far as preparing the food that is presented at fabulous events such as wedding receptions or charity dinner parties, also brings about thoughts of other behind the scenes “real life” occurrences.
Most people probably don’t think twice about the many hours of details, work and teamwork that are required to plate dozens or hundreds of mouth-watering hors d’ oeuvres, entrees, and desserts, etc. that are consumed at those event spectaculars. Recipes sometimes have to be tweaked in order to accommodate for the number of people to be served for a given event. Then there’s the heat filled kitchens to deal with, fingers can be accidentally burned and/or cut, and certain ingredients might have to be substituted. Anyway, there are many things that could go wrong unbeknownst to the guests, as it should be, by the time everything is brought out to the dinning area. To the guests it’s just a matter of whether the food tasted good and to some maybe also how the food looked on the plate – the presentation. Regardless of what mishaps might have occurred prior to and during the food preparation processes, the event servers must do their job in an effortless manner in front of the guests. I’m sure no one would want a clumsy waiter/waitress dishing up his or her food or being served food that tastes like castor oil – After all, the hotel, cater, and/or restaurant’s reputations are at stake. That’s what that industry is all about, good food, good service, and happy customers, that make for a more profitable business.
How the show “Behind the Bash” equates to other “real life” situations? –
I remember a few months ago another woman and I were discussing how some people put on a different face based on the people they’re around at a given time. Anyway, the subject of marriage came about and the woman whom I was conversating with made the statement that she had been married for “x” number of years and how that’s a great accomplishment.
Whoa! I used to be programmed as many others, I’m sure, to blurt out the typical response, “Congratulations! That’s wonderful!” But, as I have come to learn, there is sometimes a contingency of negativity associated with being married for a long time.
I know of several instances (known cheating, convenience, and verbal and physical abuse, etc.) wherein people have stayed married to each other simply because of the economic, family and/or societal “shame” factors often accompanied with SOME cases of “DIVORCE.”
I’ve sat and listened to some women justify all sorts of abusive situations and instances of their mate cheating that they’ve endured and their apparent distress over those experiences. But then when someone brought up the suggestion of counseling, severing ties, or at least making an attempt to sever ties, with the abuser or cheating spouse, heads lower and the excuses fly. But, they’ve been married for “x” number of years. So, I no longer blurt out congratulations just because of the number of years someone states they’ve been married. Instead, I find myself simply responding by stating, “As long as you’re happy.” And I leave it at that.
The conversation about marriage longevity usually ends at that point because the other person doesn’t want to further the discussion, especially if they know they are hiding their fear of breaking a cycle of abuse or other issues of unhappiness as a result of being married.
It’s not easy to make such a life-changing decision as divorce because there are some serious issues one would have to face. But sometimes, just sometimes, finding peace of mind, is worth all of the personal anguish and societal sneers (being surrounded by an unsupportive bunch of people) one might experience to obtain that peace.
I know – I lived that anguish and I experienced those sneers. But, after having been divorced for several years, I have finally found that peace of mind.
I have grown to realize that I made the right decision for me – Besides, regardless of what anyone else said/says about the reasons for my divorce, they didn’t live through what I did before, during, and too many years after my divorce was finalized. And, overall, most of the people who judged/judge me so harshly did it out of their apparent dislike for me personally despite their knowledge of, or lack of knowledge of, the factors that led to my ultimate decision to end my marriage. I also would like to add that most of my criticizers were women! Imagine that!
Most importantly, though, I believed that my faith in GOD would get me through many a rough day – He has. And, GOD continues to bless me everyday, even when I don’t always understand certain things that happen, I know the outcome will be an indescribable peace.
And, as with the mishaps that may occur with food preparation “behind the bash” that leads to a flawless presentation, I know that GOD is preparing me for a flawless presentation to my future husband, and vice versa – That’s an event I look forward to attending.
- By Jane L. Wilson
Posted By: Jane L. Wilson
Friday, July 21st 2006 at 12:20PM
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