Ms. Independent
Strong, Black...
Keep it movin'
I noticed when I logged on that there is a post about Monique being molested as a child. So many people of color live with childhood secrets, life altering disappointments, and the pressures of playing multple roles to fit in - all in silence. Part of the HBCU experience is embracing our strength and courage as a people. However, I commend Monique because the reality is we are weak, we are hurting and we perish every day trying to live up to a myth that should be torn down from the roots. Silence does not equal strength!
According to Terrie M. Williams, author of Black Pain, founder of a top NYC celebrity public relations firm, and Columbia University graduate the greatest injustice we can do to future generations of HBCU students and to generations of our own children is to continue in silence. These children need to realize that while many of us are looking super human on the outside, we are dying on the inside. It may not be suicide, but overindulgence, destructive lifestyles, or drugs that lead to our self medicating destruction. Openness and vulnerability are not weaknesses but can only add to the great strength of our people when we open the dialogue for healing that comes from the release of pain. When you are moving at the speed of light, sometimes you don’t even feel it.
It’s not until you give yourself the gift of time, the gift of discovery that we consider what we are holding. If the image is not pretty, it's not easy for any one to take all of their clothes off and say, "This is who I am". But it isn't until we take that drastic first step that we begin to let go of the mask. If we chose not to let go, the mask will crack, Williams said. It is only a matter of time.
Williams, who was invited to participate in a Black Enterprise panel for top corporate entrepreneurs said "I can't talk about being on top without telling you how I suffer." In 2005 Williams, highly driven and determined to save the world, opened her own wounds about bouts with depression. She started a Healing starts with us revolution. The exposure in Essence magazine prompted more than 10,000 letters from other hurting Black men and women.
She encourages sisters and brothers to "feel the pain" work through the butterflies that surely come when you are open about the hurt. We lie. We act like we are not disappointed. We put on the mask… We wear the game face… We stunt our growth. Instead we should build a safe haven for open dialogue for ourselves and for those who are tracking our footsteps.
Williams bit of inspiration:
“When you know that the life, strength and spirit of others depends on your life, your strength, and your spirit, you have no right to be afraid – even if you are terribly afraid.”
by God’s Bits of Woods – Ousmane Sembene
Stay Strong!
Posted By: Joyce Brayboy
Wednesday, September 17th 2008 at 10:28PM
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