It's the word that nobody wants to be associated with. Bipolar! Bipolarity! Bipolar I! Bipolar II! Manic Depression!
Those labels have become synonymous with stinky, dirty people, "Postal!" "Crazy" "Split-Personality." And the list goes on. Naturally, who wants that title? I did not, but when I was "labeled" with something, anything, I just wanted to be cured.
Then the shocker (twist the knife, please). There is NO cure!
Those were the scariest days of my life in the first few years with this brain disorder. I waited for death too much. I figured it would lead to a brain tumor the size of California and Lord knows it felt like it at times.
When I drew closer to God, however, I began to find manageability of the brain disorder. You would be surprised what education can do to give you a quality of life and yes, it's true, a mind is indeed a terrible thing to lose. So, why are you losing your mind or allowing a loved one to?
Maybe it will help to say that the brain disorder is treatable. Stay away from negative information about the mental illness until you are stabilized.
Let me share with you what I learned and hopefully this will inspire you to seek mental healthcare from a professional, because I am not. I'm just a nobody, trying to tell everybody, about Bipolar and living WITH the brain disorder. By the way, the new politically correct word is "Brain Disorder" so take all those negative and hurtful adjectives our of your vocabulary, PLEASE!
Alright, Informal Bipolar 101 - it is an imbalance of chemicals in the brain. There are neurotransmitters in the brain that go awry for some unexplained reason. The chemicals dopemine and serotonin are the main culprits. When dopemine is out of whack (uh-hm) you can become clnically depressed and when serotonin is out of whack (uh-hm) you can become manic.
There are many, many medications on the market that are known as mood stabilizers and balance these chemicals. In fact, there are too many on the market for anybody to not find one that works and begin to enjoy mental wellness.
When I was first diagnosed in 1993, I began taking 11 medications. Today, I just take two psycho-tropic medications (drugs for mental illnesses). It took faith, self-determination, self-help (educating myself about the illness) and working closely with my doctor and developing my personal relationship with God to accomplish this! Exercise and diet are also KEY to any wellness and certainly Bipolar.
So, when I'm sad, I understand what is going on and can do what it takes to stabilize myself such as contacting my doctor, attending therapy, worrying my friends, praying, walking, and, of course -- writing! I also live with my guards up against stress triggers! I have basically stopped attending funerals of very close relatives, but I will pay my respects at the family home instead, for example. In that environment, people are ususally socializing about the happy memories of the person as opposed to the sad emotions displayed at the actual funeral.
Now, when I am in manic mode, I have to work real hard to stabilize and that means contacting my close family because they will watch my behaviors (I might decide to purchase the White House, go ahead and laugh, but that's another blog), forcing myself to rest/sleep, appointment with doctor for medication/blood level check, minimizing caffeine/sugars, etc.
Also, I stick to my house/familiar surroundings. It is very important to take all medications prescribed just like you should without skipping because you feel fine? It is equally important to have a wellness prevention plan that works for you to prevent the onset of episodes, as they are called, as much as humanly possible. Some things such as surgeries can trigger an episode so work closely with your doctor. When I had some rotten teeth extracted, I had to hold back on one medication for a day because of the anesthesia - I was fine!!:)
Ok--Thank you for going deep inside my brain and it is my wish that you seek mental healthcare for yourself or a loved one and not be ashamed or make fun of them. If you have something funny to share, I don't mind, but understand that ordinary folk do judge and discriminate because of this stigmatized brain disorder. They don't understand and we have a lot of work to do to change that. Likewise, if you want to cry on my shoulders, please do.
If nobody's around in either case, there's always the National Institute of Mental Health (www.nimh.org); the Child & Adolescent Bipolar Foundation (yes, children can be Bipolar) (www.bpkids.org); the Depression and Related Affective Disorders Association (DRADA) (www.drada.org); Depression & Bipolar Support Alliance (DBSA) (www.dbsalliance.org); American Association of Pastoral Counselors (www.aapc.org); and the National Medical Association (www.nmet.org).
These leave you with too many reasons not to seek mental wellness. It is my wish that you take that first step today.
Agnes ~ Too Wise Not To Praise Him!
Author of "Cooling Well Water: A Collection of Work By An African-American Bipolar Woman" ISBN 0975461206 Winter Release Pending -
www.myspace.com/coolingwellwater
Posted By: agnes levine
Wednesday, August 20th 2008 at 4:28PM
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