The Retreat
In the middle of the pain and disappointment you are currently facing, make sure that you take care of yourself. You most certainly recognize that you are hurting. You feel it when you wake up and when you go about your day. The minute that you step out of your home or place of work you feel the pain even more because you are in public and there is no place for you to go and catch your breath. You cannot go and sit still in a favorite chair and close your eyes if you need to because you are in the public eye.
This is the time to stop what you are doing when you have the time and retreat. This needs to be explained because the word retreat means really to go back and regroup, regain your strength. Retreat does not mean a massage and a manicure and a pedicure. To really gain your strength and become yourself again you must retreat.
You no doubt are saying well I work everyday, I have the kids, I have my business, I have church or whatever else going on in my life. I just cant stop everything I am doing and go back and regroup. I say to you yes you can. You must or the healing process will be mediocre at best and you may not be completely healed.
Below are some tips you should consider when you make the decision to retreat and save your own life.
Acknowledge the hurt - You have to admit that you are not as strong as you are making out to be. Even it you speak it to yourself only. Say it. Admit the hurt and the pain and the anguish so that you can get to the root of the issue. You have been hurt. Bottom line.
Feel the pain - Don't run from the pain. That is the worst thing that you can do. Accept the hurt that you are feeling in your chest. Accept the loss of appetite and the tears. Allow yourself to go through the process of grieving because that is exactly what you are doing. Experience the loss and the reality of it.
If you need to take time do so - Even if this means that you are only going to take some quiet time on your lunch break you have to get to the point where you can quiet yourself and think. You may want to assess what happened. You may want to take into account the situation and the reality of it. Take your weekends if you can or other days off to just do what makes you happy or makes you feel good about yourself. This is a good thing to do just for you. You need to completely accept that you are being proactive in your healing.
Grieve - Take the time you need to put yourself and your emotions first. Many of us can pretend that we are ok but behind closed doors we are hurting and weeping and this sometimes goes on for years. Your goal is to make sure that you focus on your healing. What this does not mean of course is you remain in this place of grieving. You cannot or life will pass you by. Take the time you need while living the life you have and cry, pout, curl up, whine, stare into space or what ever. Then once you have done that, get up.
Assess how you are doing - During this process of healing make sure that you stop and check really your pulse. I am not saying by no means to put yourself back in harms way before you are ready but every once in a while ask yourself "How do I feel today? How does the day make me feel? Am I doing better or worse today?" Some days will be worse than others and other days you will feel like you can conquer the world. Accept each day as a process of healing no matter how you feel and know eventually the pain will cease.
Learn from the pain - Taking a note of how you got to this point of pain, be it from the hand of someone else or just life, take some time to learn from it. Talk about it with a counselor or with yourself. A journal is a great way to make this happen if you feel more comfortable that way. You will be able to measure your process of getting to the other side.
Finally, remember this; you are only human. Being hurt takes time to get over. It does not happen over night and you should not expect it to. Give yourself the time you need to regain your strength and power from the situation. During this process if you want to cry do so. If you feel like you need to sleep then sleep. Do not feel guilty about taking care of yourself. You are all that you have. You will get through this, you will make it to the other side healed, complete and strong enough to get back out there for another round of life.
Love Live Breathe
For More Like This Join http://www.lovelivebreathe.com
Connect and share with others of like minded consciousness!
This is the time to stop what you are doing when you have the time and retreat. This needs to be explained because the word retreat means really to go back and regroup, regain your strength. Retreat does not mean a massage and a manicure and a pedicure. To really gain your strength and become yourself again you must retreat.
You no doubt are saying well I work everyday, I have the kids, I have my business, I have church or whatever else going on in my life. I just cant stop everything I am doing and go back and regroup. I say to you yes you can. You must or the healing process will be mediocre at best and you may not be completely healed.
Below are some tips you should consider when you make the decision to retreat and save your own life.
Acknowledge the hurt - You have to admit that you are not as strong as you are making out to be. Even it you speak it to yourself only. Say it. Admit the hurt and the pain and the anguish so that you can get to the root of the issue. You have been hurt. Bottom line.
Feel the pain - Don't run from the pain. That is the worst thing that you can do. Accept the hurt that you are feeling in your chest. Accept the loss of appetite and the tears. Allow yourself to go through the process of grieving because that is exactly what you are doing. Experience the loss and the reality of it.
If you need to take time do so - Even if this means that you are only going to take some quiet time on your lunch break you have to get to the point where you can quiet yourself and think. You may want to assess what happened. You may want to take into account the situation and the reality of it. Take your weekends if you can or other days off to just do what makes you happy or makes you feel good about yourself. This is a good thing to do just for you. You need to completely accept that you are being proactive in your healing.
Grieve - Take the time you need to put yourself and your emotions first. Many of us can pretend that we are ok but behind closed doors we are hurting and weeping and this sometimes goes on for years. Your goal is to make sure that you focus on your healing. What this does not mean of course is you remain in this place of grieving. You cannot or life will pass you by. Take the time you need while living the life you have and cry, pout, curl up, whine, stare into space or what ever. Then once you have done that, get up.
Assess how you are doing - During this process of healing make sure that you stop and check really your pulse. I am not saying by no means to put yourself back in harms way before you are ready but every once in a while ask yourself "How do I feel today? How does the day make me feel? Am I doing better or worse today?" Some days will be worse than others and other days you will feel like you can conquer the world. Accept each day as a process of healing no matter how you feel and know eventually the pain will cease.
Learn from the pain - Taking a note of how you got to this point of pain, be it from the hand of someone else or just life, take some time to learn from it. Talk about it with a counselor or with yourself. A journal is a great way to make this happen if you feel more comfortable that way. You will be able to measure your process of getting to the other side.
Finally, remember this; you are only human. Being hurt takes time to get over. It does not happen over night and you should not expect it to. Give yourself the time you need to regain your strength and power from the situation. During this process if you want to cry do so. If you feel like you need to sleep then sleep. Do not feel guilty about taking care of yourself. You are all that you have. You will get through this, you will make it to the other side healed, complete and strong enough to get back out there for another round of life.
Love Live Breathe
For More Like This Join http://www.lovelivebreathe.com
Connect and share with others of like minded consciousness!
